Just for Men


Nobody likes my face.


I am fed up going on to web sites, normal websites, and being forced to look at that woman who has had her face done up by some dermatology expert. What is it with them….? Come to think of it, what is it with her…?

Look, if she wants to sell her product that’s fine, but when I see her mug on my football pages I get irate. And to make matters worse, it looks to me that they really made her look absolutely horrible just to accentuate the problem – or to annoy me more.

Then this morning I go on a UK newspaper website and see an advert that says “55 year old Mom looks 35”. What !!!

Maybe it’s only women who read football pages, or read online newspapers, or visit men’s health websites. Strange I admit, but I’m willing to admit that that could be the case. One of these days I might just go on to a “We sell Viagra” site and see if that woman is staring at me again. If she is, then I’ll concede that sex as we know it, could be dead for ever.

I guess they figure that men don’t care about their appearance. Who cares what my face looks like.

“64 year old Grandfather looks eh, well………. 64”

Why can’t I see “Nivea face cream for men”…?

In today’s whizz technology age, couldn’t they differentiate men from women on the Internet…?

At the top of most websites that require a Password, they have a wee button that says “Remember me”. Simple. So, how’s about they have a wee button at the top of the website that says, “Remember me, I’m a man”.

Then if I see that woman’s face ever again I could have them for false advertising. That would knock the smile of her face I’m sure. Well, if you can call that a smile.

This could revolutionise online advertising.

I would be able to go on the footie sites, where it would say “Get stuck right into him – energy pills to make you tackle harder”. (I said “you” not “your”)

Or on the newspaper sites, it would say, “This is a photo of David Beckham in his football gear, WEARING his top.”

I think I’ve just created “Men only advertising”. Revolution or revelation..?

I can’t wait to see the reaction on that woman’s face – oh wait – I won’t be seeing it any more. I bet she’ll be red in the face – oh wait. !!!

And of course, I could confidently go on to the Viagra site and an advert would pop up saying, “Yo dude, wanna have some fun this weekend..?”

Bye, Bill

3 responses to “Just for Men

  1. The government, ASA, Google or whoever controls these things need to bring you out of retirement immiediately to tackle (er.. you know) these everyday problems.

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